Won't you let me take you on a sea cruise

I love to travel but I've never felt the urge to take a cruise on a giant oceanliner. For one thing if I cared about endless buffets and cheezy floor shows, I'd go to Vegas where at least you get the added benefit of the neon lights. And the drinks are free at the casino.

For another, the idea of being trapped on a boat, no matter how big, with a bunch of American tourists is not in any way appealing. Being trapped on a broken ship with virtually no services like the doomed Carnival cruise is my worst nightmare. Nothing brings out the ugly in the ugly privileged American like a failure of expected amenities.

Meanwhile, I get that it's a legitimate news story, but the frenzied coverage has been a bit much. I mean really CNN? Is this necessary? A CNN spokesperson emails Dylan Byers:

The squalid, smelly, steamy cruise ship, which has been without power for days with 4,000 people aboard, is expected to finally limp into port later today. CNN’s Erin Burnett will anchor Erin Burnett OutFront from Mobile, Alabama, where the ship will dock. Sandra Endo covers the ship’s arrival by helicopter; Victor Blackwell monitors by boat; and David Mattingly and Martin Savidge report from the dock in Mobile. CNN.com/live and the CNN apps will live stream the docking. CNN International will simulcast the arrival later tonight.

This is apparently CNN's new business model since the new wunderkind took over running the place:

Zucker is telling reporters and producers to broaden their definition of news and include a greater selection of topics.

On Thursday, as other networks covered sober political news, CNN aired Beyoncé’s Super Bowl press conference where she broke into the national anthem to prove she could sing as well as lip-sync.

They are obviously looking for ratings to stem the bleeding of their ad revenue which fell 7 percent in 2012 while their competitors gained revenue. Apparently no one told Mr. Zucker that CNN's slide into oblivion began when they effectively declared they were going to become the new Fox News by embedding on the Tea Party Express. Their demise has only accelerated since because they've already been broadening their definition of news from useful information into puerile sensationalism and pure gossip mongering.

Of course CNN isn't the only offender. One can't help but be struck by the difference between the tone of coverage about first world problems of upper class travelers and the real life disaster of second world Americans in the Superdome at NOLA during Katrina. [image via]